Black Belt testing stress :/

Happy Mothers Day!

Ughh- black belt testing is on Tuesday and there's so much I wish I knew better! Basically I'm not ready (enough) for everything... except techniques which no one really worries about...

Where did all the time go? I've had my red tip for 6 months and yet still learned everything the 2 weeks before testing. I'm kinda annoyed at the timing, I got my red tip, then it was the tournament, then it was meet in the street. In between practicing for all of that I would've had the time to learn some of my red tip stuff- but it just didn't happen.

I still don't really know the Bo staff forms very well- but Miranda and Jeremy came over and helped a lot!!! We made up my demo... which I hope everyone will still remember come Tuesday. Anyways- Bo staff is usually the quickest/easiest thing since its not as- idk stressful...?

Then I have forms, which I was fine with until Thursday when Nathan was helping and we were doing white belt then he was like "that was good, now do it like a black belt."
what?
So then I did it again, and again, and now I'm freaking out that all of my forms aren't good enough for black belt. Everyone who has tested before me are all crazy good so how close do I have to get?

Idk why I'm suddenly freaking out over everything, cuz black belt never seemed really hard before (aside from sparring) Moderately hard- yes, nearly impossible- nooo.

Then theres sparring- ahhhh! I'm just planning on keeping myself from getting beat up.... :/

O and verses xD Every single time I always forget about verses till the day before. Well somehow this semester I wound up with around 15 new ones that I didn't recognize. Plus theres the foggy ones from the recent testing...
My mom was helping me with them and when she got to the last ones I didn't know... she was not impressed. She was getting more and more mad till finally she was like "You're gonna fail."

I took that wayyyyy to literally and started freaking out... (haha "started") Failing wouldn't be too bad... because then I wait, train, and test again with Savannah or Miranda... which is what I wanted to do in the first place. I guess I've hit my time limit though cuz Mrs. Stancil really wants me to test now.

I know after belt testing this post is gonna seem so dramatic xD